Thursday, June 5, 2008

Things a Pregnant Woman Should Never Do

1) Buy a bathing suit. Somehow the heat has boiled my brain and made me think that getting a bathing suit was a smashing idea. I ordered from Old Navy and will be sending it back.

2) Go to the mall. Today I went to buy makeup and ended up waddling behind some 5'10", blond, tan, 17 year old whose legs would go to my neck if they belonged to me. She had on a pair of shorts that had an inseam of, at the longest, 2". Bitch.

3) Wear sack dresses. They don't emphasize the pregnancy, they just make you look fat. Not cool, not cool at all.

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